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I'M VERY BLESSED THAT I HAVE SUCH A SUPPORTIVE WIFE WHO IS SECURE WITH LETTING ME EMBARRASS MYSELF. - COMEDIAN KEN JEONG

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WHY DO THEY CALL IT A 'BUILDING'? IT LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE FINISHED. WHY ISN'T IT A 'BUILT'? - JERRY SEINFELD

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I THINK THE ONLY REASON YOU VISIT AN APPLE STORE IS BECAUSE YOU WONDER WHAT LIFE IS LIKE ON ANOTHER PLANET - LEWIS BLACK

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THE TASK OF ... ALL THE ARMED FORCES: TO PROTECT THE FREEDOMS WHICH UNDERLIE THE GREATNESS OF AMERICA. - GEN. EARLE G. WHEELER

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YOU DIDN'T JUST SHOW UP ON PLANET EARTH BY ACCIDENT. YOU WERE HANDPICKED BY ALMIGHTY GOD. - JOEL OSTEEN

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ANYTHING THAT WE CAN DO TO IMPROVE THE LIVES OF ELDERLY PEOPLE IS WELCOME SO FAR AS I AM CONCERNED - JUDI DENCH

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WHEN 'HOW GREEN WAS MY VALLEY' FINALLY WRAPPED, I THOUGHT JOHN FORD WAS A WALKING GOD. - MAUREEN O'HARA